sooner. Remember that this disease was not caused or triggered by anything anyone did to the child, anything the child ate, or anything that happened during pregnancy. In addition to shock and guilt, you and your family may feel anger and sadness. Even the youngest members of your family are likely to be affected. These feelings are normal, and each family member will express them in different ways and at different times. It can be very difficult to feel so many strong emotions all at once. Talking honestly with each other about your feelings, reactions, and questions will help everyone in the family. It may seem difficult to talk to friends, family, or even medical staff, but expressing your feelings will help you cope with this situation. Your child also will benefit from family members continuing to show their care through support and communication.
n HOW CAN I HELP MY CHILD? You will notice frequent changes in your child during his or her treatment for Hodgkin lymphoma. These changes or symptoms may make you feel even more helpless. It is im- portant to remember that despite changes on the outside, your child is still the same person on the inside. Hair loss and other changes in physical appearance are temporary and often bother adults more than the child or his or her siblings and friends. All of your feelings about what your child is going through during treatment for cancer must be balanced by remembering that treatment provides an op- portunity to cure the disease so your child can go on to live a full and meaningful life. It is important to reinforce to your
child that nothing he or she did or said caused this disease. Telling your child that your angry or sad feelings are directed at the cancer and not at him or her will help preserve honesty and closeness in your relationship. Like you, your child will need someone with whom to share feelings. Do not hesitate to ask your child to express his or her feelings and do not be afraid to explain what is happening and why. In spite of the disease, your child is still developing and learning. All children, both sick and well, need love, attention, discipline, limits, and the opportunity to learn new skills and try new activities. As you learn about your child’s special needs, it is important to remember that he or she also has all of the needs and rights of any other growing, developing person. Many patients with Hodgkin lymphoma are adolescents, which presents special considerations. Do not avoid using direct terms and explanations with your child. Children will tolerate treatment better if they understand it and are allowed to be active decision makers whenever possible. The same is true for parents and family members.
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